If I could be any fictional character, I would choose to be the Michelin Man. This is probably the last character anyone else would ever choose when asked this question, but I'd like to deviate from the regular "I WANNA BE SUPERMAN CUZ FLY!" So, let's break down why being the Michelin Man would be simply fantastic. Starting with the less useful aspect, you could have unlimited tires. Did some punk let the air out of your tires while you were at the Bieber concert? Forget Triple A, just take out a section of your torso and throw it at your axle.
Now for the best part. Is some little @#$! giving you any trouble? Talking smack about your new faux hawk? Making fun of your name (Tracy is unisex!)? Just POP THAT RAT IN THE MOUTH WITH A TIRE! Could you imagine a better way to shut someone up than throwing a rubber tire 50 mph AT THEIR MOUTH? How could you pass this up? Why would you choose to be Harry Potter when you could just slam a tire in his face while he's casting his cute little avadakadabra spell? It's obvious that the Michelin Man is the correct choice for this prompt.
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