Being awkward is probably the only thing I'm actually good at, so its one of the only things I can write an experienced how-to on. However, no one actually wants to be awkward. So I don't suggest following my instructions. Maybe avoiding them is the best step.
Step One: Have Severe Social Anxiety
It's pretty simple. Dread talking to people you don't know, and you'll always set yourself up for failure when you do.
Step Two: Be Incapable of Carrying on a Conversation
Fidget. Get lost in your own thoughts. Just generally suck at trying to say what you want. Spend half the time trying to think of something to say in response to someone, and then when it comes time to actually say it, completely forget what you were thinking of. Everyone loves blank minds, right?
Step Three: Afterwards
After going through a conversation that could be described as very awkward, blush and think about what you did wrong. Run over it in your mind a couple thousand times. That way you can never get over the awkwardness.
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